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G21 HUMOR
JOKE OF THE DAY
Today's Laughs Provided by:
Bob Powers
Marietta, OH, USA
The Vasectomy
After having their 11th child, a redneck couple decided that that was enough. They could not afford a larger double-wide. So, the husband went to his doctor, who also treated mules, and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem. The doctor instructed him to go home, get a cherry bomb (small fireworks), light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.
The redneck said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."
So, the couple drove to get a second opinion.
The second doctor was just about to tell them about the medical procedure for a vasectomy when he realized how truly backwards these people were. This doctor instead told the man to go home and get a cherry bomb, light it, place it in a beer can, hold it to his ear and count to 10.
Figuring that both learned physicians couldn't be wrong, the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5 . . . . ", at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and resumed counting on his other hand.
Due to the restructuring of the CIA very intense interviews are being held and candidate loyalty and enthusiasm are being tested:
Three men are waiting to be interviewed by the director of the CIA.
He calls in the first one: "Do you love your country?"
"Absolutely!"
"Then take this gun out into the waiting room and kill your wife."
"Sorry, I love her too much."
The next guy comes in:
"Do you love your country?"
"Yes, I do!"
"Then take this gun into the waiting room and shoot your wife."
"Can I just hurt her a little?"
"No, gotta kill her."
"Can't do it, I love her too much."
The next guy comes in. "Do you love your country?"
"More than anything!"
"Then take this gun and kill your wife."
The man takes the gun and walks into the lobby.
BANG, BANG BANG.
This is followed by a series of crashes and loud noises. The man comes back in all beat up and covered with scratches.
"What happened out there!" demanded the director.
"Some moron put blanks in the gun! I had to strangle her!"
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GET INTO A G21 FRAME OF MIND..
THE MAIN EVENT
TRIO: ROD AMIS has Dangerous Visions in "Lone Gunman 3."
FLISS USSHER delivers a second Dangerous Vision! LONDON CALLING! "Stress."
IRISH EYES: before 9 April, JOE O'NEILL offered a special editorial "DEADLINE FOR PEACE."
POWERSBOOKS looks at the Dangerous Visions available from a number of books and "PRIVATE THOUGHTS."
POETRY: NATHAN BLACK - "Rationalizations of The Hermit"
BARE KNUCKLES: JEFF WINBUSH kicks off the Dangerous Visions Issue with "REGGIE WHITE GOES DOWN."
G21 ASIA RAOUL TESLA reports from Angeles, the Philippines.
JENNIFER BLUE's PLANETARY MADNESS looks at YOUR influences!