Helping Create the NEXT GENERATION of the Web: GENERATOR 21 WORLD WIDE
G21 HUMOR
JOKE OF THE DAY
Today's Laughs Provided by:
Bob Powers
Marietta, OH, USA
Are You The Right Person For Me?
Met someone special on a bbs or the internet? Wanna ask them out but not sure if you're willing to take the chance at having a life scarring experience? No problem! Give 'em this little survey to fill out. Then review the answers and decide how willing you are to take your life in your hands. Good luck!--Dr. D & Nee!
1) My name is:_______________________________.
2) The gender I claim to be is: (M)ale (F)emale
3) My real gender is: (M)ale (F)emale (T)hree-Mile Island
4) The age group I fall into is:
(A) 40 and older
(B) 30-39
(C) 21-29
(D) 15-20
(E) I wanna be a Power Ranger
5) In the past year, I have had:
(A) 1-5 dates
(B) 6-10 dates
(C) 11-15 dates
(D) More than 16 dates
(E) I rape sheep
6) I have the proper height/weight ratio for:
(A) the average human of my age and gender
(B) Gorgo, the four-head Dragon
(C) a washer and dryer set
(D) Ireland
(E) My gelatenous mass cannot be measured at any given moment for I am an ever-shifting entity
7) The reason I stayed at home last Friday night was:
(A) the last time I got in a car, all four wheels popped.
(B) strict upbringing makes me morally superior.
(C) the voices won't let me.
(D) it was a bad idea to drown Marge.
8) On a date, I prefer to take my companion/be taken to:
(A) a romantic, candlelit Italian cafe.
(B) International House of Pancakes.
(C) Bubba's Beer and Bait Shop.
(D) the dumpster behind 7-11.
9) For entertainment, I like to:
(A) watch movies/plays.
(B) watch cock fights.
(C) undulate my twelve chins to the theme of "Bewitched."
(D) snap the necks of mammals smaller than me.
10) My idea of the perfect male/female is:
(A) Keanu Reeves/Winona Ryder.
(B) Trent Reznor/Courtney Love
(C) Oral Roberts/Janet Reno.
(D) my fist/my fingers.
18) A nickname my friends may give me would be:
(A) Sexy/Ace/Bunny/Sweetie/etc.
(B) Scrotum Thief.
(C) Commander Nasal Clit and his Amazing Elbow, Sparky.
(D) The Thrustinator.
(E) Exxxxtacy Maggot.
21) My favorite type of literature is:
(A) computer tests like this one.
(B) public restroom stalls.
(C) anything on the newsgroup alt.beastiality.
(D) the magic writing on the back of my foot.
(E) the toe tags at the morgue when I'm on my "rounds."
33) My sign is:
(A) Some zodiac thing.
(B) "Child at play."
(C) "All you can eat."
(D) "Billions and Billions served."
(E) "Dip."
+++ the PREVIOUS JOKE +++ THE NEXT JOKE +++
GET INTO A G21 FRAME OF MIND.
THE MAIN EVENT
ON DRUGS: ADAM J. SMITH reports on recent Congressional testimony by Drug Czar Barry McCaffrey and asks, "Who's A Fraud?"
QUEER PLANET: You knew it before as "Stonewall Views." Get re-acquainted with the writings of PHIL MARTIN on a Queer Planet: "One Wedding and No Funerals."
RADIO ACTIVE: RAHEEM gets into a new groove as part of this column's new name. Check it out in its first feature, "My Cup."
TABLOID HART: Texas badboy THOMAS HART is back to dish on KENNETH STARR, notorious nanny LOUISE WOODWARD, and PIT BULLS. [Not more dog letters in "Vox Populi!" -- Ed.]
POWERSSOUND: BOB POWERS is on Cloud 9(or is that only Love Potion #9?) because ALANIS MORISETTE is back in the studio.
BarnesandNoble SEARCH: Every writer here still reads offline. We support Barnes and Noble and hope you will, too. This is the place to find the best and brightest!
