OAKTOWN, CALI - There is something magical about the night. You understand what I'm saying, Homes?
I have felt that way ever since I was a little kid. My Moms and my brother, Aziz, used to tease me about it because I loved to go riding my bike around the hood at night. They thought I was crazy. Aziz used to say that if I kept that stuff up, I'd end up being "a mushroom" --- meaning, after the drive-by, the brothers would say they hadn't met to off me, I just happened to "pop up" while the Glocks was blazing.
I never let what they said, only half-kidding, bother me, though. I grew up in the 'hood, and I knew when shit didn't feel right. Trouble has its own kindah smell...
Naw, as soon as I was old enough to be allowed out on my own at night, I was in Hog Heaven.
I mean, the night just feels different. It has a lighter, cooler texture than the day. I always felt like I could race the wind on my bicycle at night, go much faster than I ever wouldah imagined during the day, or jump higher, or run faster, fueled by that special intoxication of cool darkness.
I used to tear through the streets of these East Oakland flats like a banshee. Hell, if I had run up on a drive-by --- at night with all its speed and sleek, dark adrenalin --- I prob'bly couldah out run them bullets!
But I was lucky, Homeboys and girls. Never ran up on nothin' accept maybe some liquored-up fools as drunk with the wonder of the night, and its glorious canopy of constellations, as I was. They knew.
Back then, as a kid, I used to ache for the day when I was grown and on my own, so I could just bask in the mystery of the night as long as I wanted. The closer it got to midnight, the more alive and energized I felt. No lie. Being able to stay up deep into the night was one of my fondest dreams.
So as I got older, I would do it. When I was in my twenties, many was the dawn that would catch Raheem just pullin' the covers over his head and shuttin' his eyes after ragin' through these city streets all night. It was glorious! I still feel better today after the sun goes down, but I also know things at the warehouse ain't gonnah get any lighter the next day just because I had my special taste of the dark elixir before going in.
So, like a lot of ya'll, I rein in my love of the night, and puts this nappy head on the pillow at a semi-decent hour. I live for the weekends, when I can stay up late and try to slake my unquenchable hunger for the nightlife. "I owe, I owe, so off to work I go..." I'm sure there's a credit card company, and a banker, laughing somewhere about that particular bumper-sticker phrase.
Which means, Homes, I've pretty much ended up back where I started as a young blood.(Remember that Youngblood's song, "Darkness, Darkness?") Because the world is designed this way, I have to do my obeisance to the world of daylight. I have to envy those folks who [by dint of] having the money, or the hustle going on at night, or the lack of gumption just not to care how they lives, revel in the ability to savor the nights.... But one day, some day, I'll be out there on the blue streets of the city with them, I'll be enjoying the nightlife again, too.
That's a promise I've done made to myself.
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