"Di'n't you used to be a technology columnist?"

Yeah, me and about fifty other writers I know, before the Dot-com implosion last year. Now we write on other topics, when we can still find a paying publisher, or we dig ditches. That doesn't mean I'm not interested anymore, or that I don't still get items which expose the fun and frolic which characterize "The Information Age." (Remember that phrase?) So I've got a couple of items for your amusement and amazement this week, the first of which strikes close to home. Can you say "Western Union Online?"

This saga comes to me from a dear friend in Pennsylvania who, considering my current penury and attempting to help me solve a transportation problem to a new job, decided to rush some money to me using Western Union. Being a busy executive with Internet access, he figured he could simply send the monetary "care package" from his desk with a couple of clicks of his mouse-button. Guess again. Here's what ensued:

I am trying to send some money to a friend in New Orleans using your website. No matter what credit card I use, i.e., VISA or MasterCard, I get a dialogue box that says that my bank card has already expired. My cards are not slated to expire until 2003. What is wrong with your system?

[Name Withheld -- RA]

First Western Union Response: Hello,

Thank you for your inquiry.

We are not sure why you were experiencing difficulty while visiting our website. Without obtaining more information from you we would be unable to examine the problem you seemed to be experiencing.

Unlike most forms, the expiration year requires all four digits. Some of our customers were being rejected by only typing two of the year's digits: 03 instead of 2003.

Once an error message is received, the error will remain even when the customer pages back and forth while using their own computer's "page back" and "page forward". So, the result is a continuous error.

We only mention this because of our similar experiences with our other customers. Always use the directional arrows located at the bottom of each of our web pages.

If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to contact us again. Have a good day.

Adam, Operator 120


I am aware that only typing in two of the digits will generate the type of error of you described. From the outset, however, I have been entering four digits for the expiration year as clearly directed. I have tried two different bank cards, both having expiration dates in the year 2003, and have received the same message. I have also checked with the card issuers who have reported that other transactions on my card(s) are going through without a hitch. There is a glitch on your website and it should be corrected.

Thank you.

Second Response from Western Union: Hello,

Thank you for your reply. We apologize for giving you the previous suggestions.

After checking with our systems development team, we have determined that the problem lies with the browser, such as Internet Explorer or Netscape and must be updated to 5.0 or better.

This should correct any errors which pertain to the expiration date, scrolling, etc.

We appreciate your business and look forward to serving you again.

Adam, Operator 120

So called "Customer Satisfaction" loops like this drive me batty! Let's pause to recap for a moment:

1. Potential customer contacts business to complain of inability to get service. Business responds: "Hey maybe it's because you're too dumb to use our system -- like a lot of our other [non-]customers seem to be -- so try it again using four digits, idyit. Later."
2. Potential customer explains that he did follow the correct procedure and the business's system failed to operate as described. Business responds: "Oh! Sorry. Well, if it isn't you, then in must be your browzer. Thanks for your business and come again!"

But NO, there's still more:

Your systems development team may be correct but my browser is the 6.0 version of Internet Explorer.


Third response from Western Union: Hello,

If the page is not scolling to the next webpage, I have no solution. Did you sign out of the website and sign back in? Try to get on a different server. The server shows in the web address, the address shows http://www2.westernunion.com, where "2" is the server. You cannot select the server in the address. The system assigns the server for you.

Sue Ann, 983

That had to be the most helpful message of all, am I correct?

You'll be happy to know that my friend simply went to a live agent in a W.U. aftet W.U. Response #1. (Well, I was happy to know that, at least.) After that, it was more of an academic exercise for him to see if anyone would ever actually offer to conduct a transaction.

Guess what? The help center people at Western Union had forgotten that there was even a customer transaction to be processed. They just continued to send inane or misguided messages -- AND THE ORIGINAL PROBLEM WAS NEVER SOLVED.

EDMUNDS.COM PICKS MINI COOPER

"The Most Wanted awards recognize the current model year vehicles the Edmunds.com editors would choose, for each of 30 popular vehicle categories, if we were spending our own money," explains Karl Brauer, Editor-In-Chief of Edmunds.com. "For this task, our demographically diverse editorial staff is guided by passion, not science, choosing vehicles we'd love to have in our own driveways."

In conjunction with the Most Wanted award announcements each October, Edmunds.com also selects the Most Significant Vehicle of the Year. This category recognizes a vehicle that changes the rules of a given segment, creates a brand new niche or redefines an automaker's image. The Mini Cooper exemplifies this, as it has been transformed by BMW into a technologically advanced, low-priced vehicle that retains its head-turning heritage despite being all new this year -- its first substantial update since the 1950s.
Details on all award winners are listed at http://www.edmunds.com/reviews/mostwanted/2002/index.html and video clips are available at http://www.edmunds.com/video/.

(That was fun, especially considering that the Mini Cooper is an old Rover vehicle that was completely redesigned by BMW when they (temporarily) acquired that company. But what I found more enticing, being consumer-oriented, was this announcement from two days earlier:)

Edmlunds.com now offers drivers comprehensive vehicle maintenance information including estimated parts and localized labor costs. This useful information, included in the new Edmunds Maintenance Guide, keeps consumers aware of scheduled maintenance, recall notices and technical service bulletins affecting their vehicles. The Maintenance Guide is directly accessible at http://www.edmunds.com/products/maintguide/index.html?ID=lin1038, and via a new icon on the upper right side of the site's home page, http://www.edmunds.com.

The Guide covers nearly all vehicles dating back to the 1990 model year. Features include factory-recommended mileage and calendar service intervals; items to be inspected, replaced or serviced at that time; the estimated parts costs and localized labor costs; NHTSA recall notices and technical service bulletins; and definitions of all applicable automotive terms.