by Radio Raheem
G21 Staff Writer

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kabuki theatre of the mind

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OAKLAND, CA, USA - Now and again, one of the writers here gets assigned an article. It doesn't happen that often. It did for me this month, because our Esteemed Editor was about to drop me from the writers roster after more than eight years of faithful service -- well, uhm, up until this year that is -- because I haven't been contributing much lately. My assignment: elucidate on the Chinese lore about the Five Happinesses.

Excuse me, but what kind of assignment is that for a brother? The only thing I know about Chinese people, living here on the Left Coast, is that they run some damned fine laundries and make kick-ass take-out. "The Five Happinesses?" What the hell is that all about?

Okay, okay! I do know about that Ingrid Bergman movie, "The Inn of the Seventh Happiness," That's about it.

Then I learn from our Esteemed Editor that, in the Chinese tradition, there are only five known happinesses:

1. longevity,
2. wealth,
3. health,
4. virtue and
5. peaceful death

Look at that last one, Homeboys and -gals. What's a brother or sister know -- especially if you are under 30 years of age -- about a "peaceful death?" Where I used to live, out in the east Oaktown flats, most kids figured when they reached their teens they were facing the last and best years of their lives.

Five Happinesses. Man!

After reading the e-mail, I wallowed with this one for the next few days. The e-mail concluded with the warning that I had until Monday (today) to deliver my copy.

Here I am.

Every culture eventually comes to a definition of successful life. For example -- given here as a parallel -- Abdul Rauf, a New York City imam, states in his new book What's Right With Islam [HarperSanFrancisco] that shariah is actually a framework for the five important facets of existence:

1. life
2. mind
3. religion
4. property and
5. family.

It can easily be argued, also, that establishing goals for existence is the unifying thread of most modern philosophies. It has been postulated by some theologians that the radical innovation of Pauline Christian doctrine was changing the religion from one of the observance of laws and customs to one based on faith and divine grace. This change moved Christianity from being a simple Jewish sect, the argument goes, into a philosophy more in keeping with the modern philosophical tradition of setting life/success goals.

The Chinese, because they are one of the most continuously united cultures on Earth, have come up with more than one definition of the successful life over the millennia. The familiar ones we all have heard something about: Confucianism, the Tao, their branches of Buddhism - especially the Tibetan variation. The Dalai Lama, for example, has even been featured in this magazine.

From what little I have found on the Internet, the tradition of the Five Happinesses is one of the oldest of these definitions and still carries an enduring resonance. In Chinese culture, there were believed to be five basic elements, rather than four, and symbols in art meant to be good luck are said to be representative of these five happinesses.

As we can see from the choices, this was a time when the people had a very practical and "on-the-ground" perspective on life. Who would not want to aspire toward these Happinesses as goals for their earthly existence?

It could easily be argued, in fact, that the approach being taken by the Chinese government and people -- as they become the economic center of the East -- are very much consistent with the outlook of the Five Happinesses.

How equipped are we in the West to achieve the Five Happinesses? Look around you.

The "average" American, for example, if you can find him or her, complains of

• information overload,
• too many hours at work,
• too few at home,
• crime on the streets (even though crime has been on the decline for years,)
• the threat of terrorism (even though more Americans have died from being struck by lightning than actual terrorism in every year except 1995 - McVeigh -- and 2001 - bin Laden. More Americans will be killed this year from traffic accidents than from terrorism.)

The "average" American can't find most countries on a world map, can't name the Secretary of State, and doesn't have a passport. (The last figures on passports show that less than 15% of American citizens have a passport to travel abroad.) This wonderful group of my fellow-citizens are not multi-lingual. In fact, the evidence is that a large percentage of th em are semi-literate in their native tongue, English, by international standards. Students from Italy know more of the half million words in the English language than some adults in Jackson, Mississipppi.

So let's go back to those Five Happinesseses one at a time:

1. Longevity: The problem here is healthcare, in two ways. Americans, unless they are Blacks in the South or anybody in Appalachia, aren't about to starve. Exactly the opposite is true. The scourge of obesity and its attendant health problems -- diabetes, heart disease, etc. -- is pandemic in the United States. This fact, coupled with the United States having the most expensive system of healthcare among industrialized nations -- predictions are it will go bust within ten years and NO ONE will be able to afford the American healthcare system, this despite the fact that it has been proven that universal healthcare actually saves corporations money -- means that mortality rates in the United States are doomed to increase.

   No need to worry about your retirement plan, Gen Y; you won't need one.
   
   

2. Wealth: We are Deficit Nation. You can't have wars and tax cuts simultaneously. Those are just the rules of the game. The dollar is plunging now and most informed economists don't see a time when the trend will reverse. Between the imports from China for just about everything we use and the very expensive oil imports from OPEC, we are screwed.
   
   
3. Health; See the first item above. Consider becoming a Vegan.
   
   
4. Virtue: Who would you like to try to kid? Just as there is no such thing as a 16 year old American virgin, I don't even know evangelical preachers for whom I would use that word.

   The President of the United States is a former cocaine addict. Need I say more?
   
   

5. Peaceful Death: No Comment.

Like I began, I was assigned this consideration. I certainly can understand why our Esteemed Editor would like to know about those Five Happinesses, considering how his life was and continued to be dogged by multiples sadnesses. So there you are Rod-Man. I pray you can find at least a couple of them.

Peace Out.

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