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The Immigration Edition
CRUNCHTIME: IN G21 SPORTS, Wally Worts returns to sing the praises of MICHAEL JORDAN.
TABLOID HART: PREMIERE! THOMAS HART debuts his new column by exploring "THE SNL CURSE: Who'll be Next?"
YOUR FUTURE revealed yet again in JENNIFER BLUE's PLANETARY MADNESS, StarChild.
POWERSBOOKS: G21 brings you more of Authors-Online. BOB POWERS interviews acclaimed author BOBBIE ANN MASON.
Your HOUSE OF CARDS has an all new Joke of the Day. ON DRUGS: ADAM J. SMITH argues the United Nations is "Making the World Safe for War."
DON'T READ ME FIRST!: The place to get the lowdown on this week's edition of the magazine. G21 NEWS: PREMIERE! Our special news section features a call to action as the U.S. Senate threatens to bring back the flag-burning amendment to the Bill of Rights. HIGHLIGHTS of the SCHOOL'S OUT Edition BARE KNUCKLES: JEFF WINBUSH on history's cycles in "Death & Texas."
STONEWALL VIEWS: In "Pompous Circumstances," PHIL MARTIN talks about what gay grads can do when School's Out.
POWERSSOUND: PREMIERE! Our (ever-more-roving) reviewer, BOB POWERS, adds music to his quiver.
TRIO: RADIO RAHEEM thinks school should be out for adults, too!
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JOHN BELUSHI... GILDA RADNER... These two talented, young comedians met as part of the premiere cast of a new concept in late night television programming: Live Comedy. It was the mid-70s and a new kind of hip, non-ideological irreverence was rife in the land. Mort Sahl was old hat, and the American television-viewing public had even begun to believe that Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon were their closest connection to the "cool" of the Rat Pack. The kids who had grown up with television, from Lucy and Ricky to George and Gracie, needed something just a little more ascerbic to keep them involved.
Enter
Lorne Michaels and NBC television, and nothing would ever be the same for John, or Gilda, or the late night television audience.... or many people to follow.
G21 TABLOID HART means to look at the anomalies in American culture, the strange and all-too-coincidental interstices of success and destruction. Be here every week as we answer the questions enquiring minds have to ask.
In a Saturday Night Live sketch, before his death, John Belushi made a tour of a "supposed" SNL graveyard, made-up to look like the old man he would never be. He said words to the effect that Chevy Chase had died after his first movie with Goldie Hawn.
Fact or ... revelation.
Lorne Michaels was relieved of his duties as SNL producer for a short period. Cast members came and went without incident.
THEN Lorne Micahels returned. Shortly thereafter, a young, talented comedian named CHRIS FARLEY also joined the SNL cast. But Chris had two now-understood-as-tragic flaws:
And now, only weeks ago, Phil Hartman.
Phil Hartman was a Canadian immigrant to these United States. He developed his talent, never the star, always the supporting player, and gained affection and a reputation as a guy who loved life.
Phil would go on to become a household name on the television programs "The Simpsons" and "News Radio."
But Phil was part of a special fraternity. Phil had been on SNL.
Phil Hartman met a trailer-trash bimbo from North Dakota, while the prospects for his career were still anybody's guest. She came to Hollywood to be a model, she said, but then she latched onto the first up-and-comer she could find and clung like a pit-bull.
Rather than be kicked to the curb like a low-rent Marla Maples, rather than take the Jim Carrey-treatment, Brinn(a new name she took for herself which wouldn't sound as common as "Brie") went the Rickey Lake route: "You Go(Postal,) Girl!"
And, tragically too, Phil Hartman had met
Lorne Michaels.... and become another in line for the SNL Curse.It is no surprise to anyone who has followed the saga of the SNL Curse that payment was due.
But the question which remains is WHO WILL BE NEXT?
But no one who has followed the twisted, labyrinthine maze of deception and intrigue which has been the saga of the SNL Curse could fail to miss its one anomaly: EDDIE MURPHY.
Eddie Murphy, a poor kid from the streets of New York City, one of the toughest cities on planet earth, suddenly demonstrates a facility for mimicry and doing dialects and voices --- AFTER HE MEETS
Rather than reaching the pinnacle of his career only to be cut short, Murphy, strangely, does not suffer any of the ramifications of the SNL Curse. Instead, he flourishes. He becomes his own little industry.
And when you look at it, none of the Black SNL alumni have had any problems. Garrett Morris: still working. Chris Rock: bigger by the milisecond. Eddie Murphy: you be the judge.
Enquiring minds might ask: Deal with the Devil... ?
There should be no doubt in the mind of any rational person that the SNL Curse exists and that Lorne Michaels is its instrument.
TABLOID HART knows that young comedians reading this are probably shocked and horrified. You can still answer your telephones, though.
If Lorne Michaels or NBC Television in New York calls you, pretend to be Juan, the valet, or Consuelo, the lady in waiting.
It is not an option, in a civilized society, for us to hunt Lorne Michaels down and shoot him like a dog, thus we must come up with another solution.
Jane Curtain, Dan Ackroyd, Norm MacDonald, my line is open for you. WHO WILL BE NEXT?
Finally, all of us who care about America's(and, okay, even those Canuck implant) comics must ask one important question: Who will be next?
+++ TRIO +++ The Next TABLOID HART +++