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Event #133: Not Your Grandfather's Web Magazine.
 DAY ONE: TODAY: ROD AMIS prognosticates on the (re-scheduled) Unamerican.com interview.
 THE AISLE SEAT: BRYAN POWERS reviews "54."
 TABLOID HART: The King of Dish waxes philosophical? Egads!
YOUR VOX POPULI page gets a new update. More e-mails from Loyal Rooters.  HOT LINKS(Not From Louisiana): RADIO RAHEEM expands our Link Partners Program, by welcoming new Partners from around the globe.
 Planetary Madness: JENNIFER BLUE looks at your horoscope for this week.
 THE FIRST TIME: A reader shares his story.
 G21 SPORTS: KO is back with the second of his NFL predictions for this season. This week: THE NFC.
 POWERSBOOKS: BOB POWERS reviews a new tome by EKNATH EASWARAN, GARY WEBB's "Dark Alliance", and "C'mere, Kitty" by ALAN KATZ.
 ON DRUGS: ADAM SMITH challenges the law of the land in "One in Thirty-Five."
 SEA OF DREAMS: We have a winner! The first winner of ZenCyn's Dream Interpretation Contest is featured.
DON'T READ ME FIRST! Our Publisher gives the skinny on our largest weekly kick-off ever. LAST WEEK's EDITION For rapid response, use The Message Board |
When we are not talking about space alien abduction, kids born with the tail of a pig, or amazing rescues from pit bull attacks, we get a hearty heaping of what "real life" is like. We got couples confronting each other over infidelity, threatening to "kick (folks) to the curb" over their mode of employment or because of lack thereof, sisters who sleep with each others fiances, folks lying to their spouses about their real sexual preference, kids who accuse their parents of chld abuse, trailer trash who dress like whores and believe this shows they have "a high self-esteem." And the main element of all this trailer park buzz, Pardners? It is confrontation.
We all know the drill. "Robin is here today because she has something to say to her lover, Steve. I'll be quiet now, Robin, you go ahead and talk to Steve..."
In the Tabloid World, the only people who seem to have happy and well-adjusted relationships are televangelists(if you don't count Jimmy Swaggart and the Bakers), them politicians with deaf mute wives who are refugees from Stepford(we all know who they are,) and the folks in the Six Flags, Great America, and Mickey D's commercials. Everybody else in America, the Tabloid World shows us, is a sick and twisted individual.
G21 TABLOID HART means to look at the anomalies in American culture, the strange and all-too-coincidental interstices of success and destruction. Be here every week as we answer the questions enquiring minds have to ask.
Is it any wonder we can't hold half our damned marriages together? Is it any big surprise that most of the folks we know come from dysfunctional backgrounds? I don't think so.
We have managed in the Tabloid World to raise the confessional to a high art that even Catholics have to wonder about. At least, before Pope John Paul, you only had to share your dirty laundry in a closed box with one other person who was behind a screen. Now, hell, folks are lined up around the block, calling 800 numbers to let the whole world know that they parade around the house in bikini briefs and black garter belts(the men) and they would steal their best friend's man at the drop of the hate(the women, and some of the men.)
Worse yet, the only folks I see out in the Tabloid World that is truly and deeply in love with their partners are the ones who saddled up with Losers and Deviants. They knew what they was getting right out of the box and were proud for the chance. They make the best Tabloid Television guests because they are ready to defend their freakazoids against the unbridled jeering of any studio audience crowd. These are the folks who pick fights with the people in the front row seats because "You don't know him/her! You can't judge our lives!"
Seeing that kind of loyalty and devotion can't help but put a lump in your damned throat. 'Does mine.
| Hey, Sanitation Engineers! Not tired of the dish yet?
Then ya'll are cordially invited to drop on in, and join, TABLOID HART's TRAILER PARK. We have a chat room, for when all of us is loitering there together. And I especially want ya'll to check the Trailer Park Discussion Area. Have a celebrity you hate? An idea as to what we oughtah do? Come on in! |
Now which type of person you think will have home videos of their lives entertaining the people in the trailer park?
The buzz on the street in Hollyweird is that Cameron Diaz, of the recent summer hit "There's Something About Mary," may soon be taking a trip down the aisle, Sanitation Engineers.
It seems that this dishy blonde's boyfriend, actor Matt Dillon, was seen last week cruising the jewelry stores of Rodeo Drive looking at.... engagement rings.
That's a sure sign of somebody wanting to take his Main Squeeze off the show room floor.
With any luck, it will only be a couple years before we can relish the satisfaction of hearing how these two screwed up each others lives, like we did with Bruce and Demi a few months back. Yum-yum!
Remember: It will take more than a few tornadoes to blow away all of the trailer trash.
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