G21 TRIO: A Series of Voices
AUSTIN, TEJAS - I'm starting to feel damned important.
According to my snail-mail, I have been "selected" by COMPUTERWORLD magazine to take part in an "exclusive, FIRST-EVER" poll of IS professionals. This, I surmise, because I have a title, and a corner office at one of Austin's Silicon City up-and-happenin g software companies. (You see, in New York City they give you an [Silicon] "Alley," California, they give you a "Valley"; down here in the home of steers and the right to carry side-arms we get the Real Thing, a city!
I'm going to talk more about the IS survey, but first let me tell you why else I'm starting to feel important.
 TRIO THOMAS HART returns to tell "WHY I'M SO IMPORTANT"
 POWERSBOOKS looks at a book which claims to prove Stephen Foster is the Father of Pop Music!
TRIO ROBIN MILLER makes the "CONFESSIONS OF A RESTAURANT BIGOT"
 CULTURE CAST provides the formulae for true "Happiness"..
More meta-criticism of pomo American life. ANOTHER Great Joke of the Day in THE HOUSE OF CARDS!  JENNIFER BLUE's PLANETARY MADNESS looks at YOUR influences!
VOX POPULI is updated, with your letters of the last week!  FLISS USSHER's G21 EUROPE column LONDON CALLING! changes venue to kick off our With Passion Issue: This week, from San Quirico, Italy
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 G21 ASIA new contributor RAOUL TESLA reports from Manila, Philippine Islands.
 BARE KNUCKLES: JEFF WINBUSH won't be seeing "Titanic." Read why here.
TRIO: San Francisco's RON MORGAN on "Kurt & Courtney."
POWERSBOOKS talks with "Notorious Victoria" author Mary Gabriel! Another G21 Exclusive Interview!
 HOT LINKS (Not From Louisiana) bestows an all-new SILVER SURF AWARD!
Hello! Use The Message Board |
I mean, besides the recognition of my importance now provided by COMPUTERWORLD, just think, my first week as a writer on the Web, the Queen of Rants, CARLENE decides to come back here to the G21 to mak e me an phenomenon!
Then, just this week, I learned from my "Informed Sources" that our publisher, Rod, the Eric Severeid of things webly, "Mr. Ruminator" himself, references my last column in his "Net Publishing" column at Suite 101! (I now have the record for putting the m ost links in a single paragraph on this site! Ya!)
(OKay, I'll admit that he only did it because an article in this week's Wall Street Journal proved to him that I was right about the whole deal with those avaricious web-browser producers. But, bottom line here, folks, is that I WAS RIGHT. Reset your default homepages now!)
Now, back to that COMPUTERWORLD survey I was telling you about.
What are these corporate shills, out of Framingham, Mass(achusetts) offering me in order to take part in their "FIRST-EVER" IS professional survey? Free stuff, of course! While losers like you may pony up dead presidents to read what these self-ordained pundits have to say about the so-called cutting-edge technology, all "IS professionals" like me have to do for 12 free issues of their rag is answer four(4) survey questions before May 8th.
So I'll answer the questions here.
- Business people are more productive if they have World Wide Web access: Yes, No, Not Sure
HART ANSWER: Well, Hell yes! If my Boss is gonnah read this survey as Holy Writ and determine, based thereon, whether or not to keep our T-1 access going, you know for damned sure that I'm gonnah say I'm more productive when I can take time out to surf the web than if I couldn't. Was this a trick question , or what?
- Most PC software is sufficiently easy to use: Yes, No, Not Sure
HART ANSWER: You're kidding, right? Microsoft needs to admit publicly that they should go back to the drawing board and re-write most of their source code. A little kid could learn UNIX, and they do, and do a better job. The worship of the GUI[Graphic al User Interface] is a JOKE being passed off on the computing public as a "platform." This stuff makes me want to hurl!
- In the future, PCs will become as common in homes as televisions: Yes, No, Not Sure
HART ANSWER: In the United States? The World? And WHEN "In the future"? The Year 2020? 2050? Be specific, dammit, if you want a valid answer to this ambiguous-as-hell question!You know what I think? I think you only care if people like me, have computers. We always will, won't we? Why would you want Ice Cube on-line?
- Microsoft is too powerful in the computer industry: Yes, No, Not Sure
HART ANSWER: How many "IS professionals" does it take to "install" a light bulb?Please tell me you're not serious about this question. Please!
So, okay. My twelve free issues are winging their way down to central Texas. Why? Because I'm so important.
Does Computerworld have a website? Probably.
But if you've read any of my columns here, you know that the last damned thing I would do would be to link you up to give their damned no-brain corporate conglomerate site one more damned hit!